Is the signing of Ngakoue going to be great? Or is this another Khalil Mack situation?

August 7, 2023 by

When Mack made his debut for the Bears, he was pretty damn good. But as the season went on, he became more invisible. Then the next year, very invisible.

I’m sure the Bears feel they have nothing to lose as this is a one-year deal. We’ll see what happens.

A Quinceanera. | Celebrating 15 years of being the darkest corner on the internet!

August 1, 2023 by

On August 1st, 2008, a phenomenon known as “Fire Dusty Baker 2” took off. For those new folks here, we were at an old site talking baseball when the person owning it disappeared without a trace. 22 year old me stepped up and brought a majority of the readers over here on that day. We have seen so much bullshit and hey, even *some* joy when it comes to Chicago sports. After all, mediocrity was what brought us here in the first place. We’ve seen some weirdos come along and tell us we are idiots over these years and we’ve had others who have praised us for our FIRE AND PASSION. But whatever it may be, we welcomed all of it with open arms.

Since then, we have had several iterations on the banner to fire countless other hacks such as Tom Thibodeau, Lovie Smith, Jerry Angelo, Matt Nagy and Ryan Pace. And now, it’s a dual banner featuring incompetent fools Ryan Poles and Matt Eberflus.

I usually write an article like this every August 1st. Last year was different because I just simply forgot. While I love this site more than anything, it just hasn’t been popping like it was even a few years ago. But I keep paying for this site every year because of the history of it. Literally 15 years of everything I’ve ever written on this site exists in the archives. I sometimes take a look at them every once in a while. Sad to say, some shit I wrote ten years ago still applies today to some teams. Nostalgia at it’s finest, I suppose.

When this website started, I was 22 and just out of college. I was still living in a tiny apartment that the bedroom was actually as big as the living room and kitchen combined. Now, I have emerged into adulthood where I work 60 hours a week and am constantly on the go. It’s also another reason why I haven’t posted as much. When football season rolls around, traffic tends to rise and engagement is more common. When logging in, I do see the stats (cue Yeti). I am very thankful to see some people checking in.

As long as I am still able to do this, I will. I wish I could write more positive articles when it comes to my teams. But damn, they just keep being mediocre. But at least I have this outlet. We have had some glimpses of recognition in the media many years back. From Sarah Spain getting pissed off at us for telling the truth about her to getting our site mentioned in Kenny Albert’s Wikipedia page, I find it all fascinating.

I seriously cannot thank you all enough. For those who just read without posting, you are just as important as the ones who do. It’s appreciated. For the regulars who still post here, you are just fantastic human beings. Even in the times we have disagreed on something, it was always a respectful debate. I have had the (dis)pleasure of meeting and being good friends with Genrebuster and Jimmy D. Then there is Chucky and while I haven’t met him, I am sure it would be a blast seeing him walk around with a chainsaw in his hands.

I really pray I don’t forget some others. But readers such as Dave, DVX, Ernie, Pie, John, Grant, USAgent and many more deserve praise. Seriously, thank you. It’s just incredible how some of us are talking here after all of these years. I sincerely do not take anyone for granted.

Here’s to many more birthdays for this dark corner of the internet.

Oh, look. Training camp has started.

July 26, 2023 by

Indeed it has. And as it goes every year, we are getting ready for another year of dropped catches, shitty play-calling, injuries, coaches lying about injuries and new ways to lose. Let’s not forget players who have no business being in the NFL (looking at you, Nathan Peterwhacker). This is the Chicago Bears.

I said a couple years back that my interest in the team at the start had never been lower. I can’t say it’s lower now. But it’s not that much higher either. It’s the same bullshit and it’s been discussed ad nauseum this offseason.

We will get all of the “we had a great week of practice” and “he looked great out there.” But until we are proven otherwise, this is the expectation. Shitty general manager and shitty coaches followed by shitty players. Any general manager who signs and then re-signs the statistically worst quarterback in NFL history gives us no reason to believe that things will be different.

In other news, Cole Kmet has been given an extension for $50 million over four years. Nice guy and all, but hasn’t produced much. If he isn’t a top five-ten tight end this year, then this is a waste of money. Travis Kelce had over 1,300 yards and 12 touchdowns last year. Now, none of us should expect those exact numbers. But let’s just say 750 yards for eight touchdowns. Anything less is a bust.

Then again, at the end of the day, the only stat that matters is wins and losses. And unfortunately, there will be more losses than wins.

Rocky Wirtz

July 26, 2023 by

From the worst franchise in professional sports to one of the greatest dynasties within a decade.

That was Rocky Wirtz. The catalyst to the change. Yes, there was a ton of controversy towards the last two or three years. We all know what happened there. Certainly, that report by the law firm showed he wasn’t aware of what was going on. Then there was that town hall last year where he went off on a reporter. A horrible set of scenarios ensued. Before I knew it, they forced their long-time announcers out of town, got rid of all of the players and coaches and started anew.

As a fan, it still feels a bit tarnished. A Stanley Cup that I had waited for my entire life happened at 24. Then at 27 and 29. So we looked up to him as a savior.

When I was growing up, the Blackhawks could never get that Cup. Teams like the Red Wings or Avalanche always stood in their way. Then as I got older, the team got bad fast. And even worse as I got into high school and college.

Then the old man kicks the bucket and his son takes over. Rocky started the renaissance. The change that we had begged for. We didn’t see it with other teams in the city. Again, controversy or not, he should be thanked for making the franchise relevant. Putting home games on TV and having ratings as a whole go up in hockey, he had a lot to do with it. He brought back Pat Foley after he was fired by his dad for no logical reason.

If it wasn’t for him, we fans probably don’t see a Stanley Cup in Chicago. So he should get his due for that. And with the team appearing to get back to being contenders in the coming years, he should be thanked.

What took so long?

July 22, 2023 by

First, I can’t remember if I heard this news last year. But I did hear about it earlier this week. Pat Hughes was finally inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. I don’t know why it didn’t happen until now. But I’m glad it did.

Him and Ron Santo were very important people in my childhood. Growing up without cable and too far to get WGN on TV through an antenna, all I had was the radio. I forgot who did it before him. But I do remember Harry Carey doing some radio games and Santo was still there.

From when I was 10 in 1996 up until 2002, almost every game was listened to on the radio. It was my escape in life from all of the bullshit I was growing up with. It was in my room by myself with the radio on 720 AM. And even from when I finally had cable in 2003 until I stopped giving a shit in 2008, him and Ron Santo were the ones who made me feel great despite the heartbreaks of the team.

I met Pat on the final home game of the 2005 season just outside Wrigley. He signed my ball and as a 19 year old, I was marking out. I spoke fast like an idiot because I was so excited. I basically told him that I had listened to him since I was a child and that he was a big part of my life. I am sure his thought was “this kid has issues.” But what he told me was “Thank you for tuning in” along with something else I can’t remember.

I may sound bitter here. But I wish the Cubs had won the World Series when I was still emotionally into it. Selfish? Probably. But still hearing him call that victory was something that reminded me of my childhood.

Congratulations. Well-earned and long overdue.

With two weeks to go until training camp, Nathan Peterman is still on the roster.

July 10, 2023 by

This guy should be somewhere in Wyoming selling insurance. Not on a professional football team’s roster.

But yet, after seven years, a team is still paying him to be the statistically worst quarterback in NFL history.

And that team is our beloved Chicago Bears.

Open thread

June 24, 2023 by

One month until training camp!

Could the Bears actually have a quarterback and not know it?

June 14, 2023 by

Tyson Bagent | Shephard University | Home of the Rams

I never heard of this college. It’s a Division II school in West Virginia. And supposedly, he set all kinds of records for Division II.

I’ve been screaming for the Bears to get a quarterback and while I would have preferred them drafting one, you just never know with this one. Yes, he will have to get past the awful mismanagement and coaching. IF that happens, the Bears could have a chance at finally having a quarterback. I have zero faith in Justin Fields staying healthy. I also have zero faith in a decent offensive line. Let’s be honest, this franchise is known for drafting and signing busts at an alarming rate. Darnell Wright could be the next in line for that.

We also have to keep in mind that Ryan Poles is a fucking idiot by not only signing Nathan Peterman last year, but also re-signing him for this year. This should be a fireable offense. But with the Bears, signing the statistically worst quarterback in NFL history is worthy of an extension.

Tyson Bagent should be the backup quarterback. No more Nathan Peterwhacker and P.J. Walker. They should possibly find another undrafted quarterback to sign as the third string as well. Because those undrafted quarterbacks have way more potential than the two who are already on the team.

Fuck Nathan Peterman.

Rest In Power, Sheiky Baby.

June 10, 2023 by

I was very fortunate to meet and chat for about a minute with him in 2016. It was one of the coolest experiences of my professional wrestling fandom. He lived a great life.

This Just In: Shitty football player skips OTA.

June 2, 2023 by

https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/37772718/bears-cb-jaylon-johnson-says-ota-absence-end-next-week

So a guy who is always hurt and sucks when he is actually on the field is skipping a chance to try to get better?

If I’m Jaylon, I show up and try to get better at football. I mean, the guy is like the rest of the corners and safeties who have played for the Bears the last couple decades by not knowing how to cover a receiver.