Archive for October, 2022

A lose-lose situation.

October 31, 2022

Why do I say that after the Roquan Smith trade today? Simple. Ryan Poles has proven to be inept at drafting even after one year. Look at the picks. Joquan Brisker sucks. Kyler Gordon is trash. Velus Jones can’t hang onto a ball. And I am not even going to start talking about the others who are irrelevant by not playing, cut from the team (already!) or are hurt. Fuck it.

What makes anyone think that with all of these draft picks the Bears have that Poles will find competent football players? So he can have all 15 picks or whatever it will be this coming offseason. None of them are going to be good because he has proven in just one year that he cannot evaluate talent.

In short, it’s a lose-lose situation. Smith wasn’t going to re-sign and there was no way the Bears are going to turn things around this season. So I guess it’s great they got two draft picks. But again, those picks are going to be trash because of Poles’ ineptitude.

That’s all I have for now. Your thoughts in the thread.

Done | Cowboys 14 Bears 0 (First quarter)

October 30, 2022

This recap is early because quite frankly, I have better things to do with my Sunday. The lawn needs to be mowed and I want to eat lunch.

The defense can’t stop a nosebleed. The “I-Pass” defense is reigning supreme. The offense is back to the same old shit.

I knew this game was over the second the ball was kicked off. The Bears were already done.

I’m out. You all can comment on the remainder of the game for your own recap of sorts.

The Bears have traded Robert Quinn to the Eagles for a fourth round pick. Now what?

October 26, 2022

Does it even matter? History tells us that this trade will mean nothing either way. If a competent general manager was in charge, then maybe the pick is exciting. But no general manager in the last 30 years has done anything to convince us differently.

There Is One Like This Every Season | Bears 33 Patriots 14

October 24, 2022

(Turn the volume all the way up in the video.)

Who here thought the Bears would win this game?

Those who raised your hand are liars.

Every year, there is that one game where nobody expects the Bears to win. Before the season started, I didn’t pick this one to be that game. The Bears played nearly perfect all game long on both sides of the ball. The conditions weren’t easy either as there was some moisture in the air. There were fumbles and slips. But holy shit. There was even a dude on ESPN saying the Bears had no chance to win. Holy shit.

Offense | What have I been screaming about all my life about it being 3rd and inches? QUARTERBACK SNEAK. I think there were three sneaks and all went for first downs. It isn’t rocket science, folks. Sneak it in for that half yard and start a new set of downs. It took the Bears the entire duration of my fandom (30-plus years) to finally have common sense. Justin Fields was running for his life and somehow made it work. The pass play to Herbert after a pump fake went for a touchdown. The replay made me shit myself seeing Fields get sandwiched. Fuck. But hey, look at the running game. Montgomery and Herbert did their thing. It really is refreshing to see a team finally run the ball when needed and not get stupid with tricks. Nothing stupid really happened tonight.

Defense | You know what else I have been screaming about my entire life with this team? COVER YOUR RECEIVERS. And what do you know? The Bears did it. Three interceptions. Why? Because they actually were following receivers around when a play was going on rather than play the coveted “COVER WHO?” defense we were so accustomed to. They also got a fumble recovery. I admit that it became concerning after Zappe went in and got two touchdowns in a manner of six or seven plays. But when the Bears got that touchdown and field goal going into halftime, the Patriots were already having their backs against the wall. The defense did something great for a change and that was not giving up any points in the second half. There I was all second half waiting for them to blow it and they didn’t. WOW.

Special Teams | Cairo Santos. He’s earned every penny of that contract. Four field goals.

Halftime | Okay. One negative. I usually find myself needing to take a shit at halftime and it seems like after I finish, the second half has already begun. 12 minutes is ridiculous. Give me 15.

The Cowboys are up next. I really do pray this is the start of something great. But again, these are the Bears we’re talking about. We’ll see what happens.

Will the Toothpick Chomping Idiot FAIL again? Or will his horses come through?

October 23, 2022

Go Phillies!

I got my horses…chomp chomp

Open thread

October 18, 2022

It’s great having a Sunday where the Bears aren’t playing. I actually get to do other things around the house or for work. This Sunday will be another where they won’t play. Unfortunately after, the remaining ten games are noon starts.

Rest In Power | Jerry Vainisi and Bruce Sutter

October 14, 2022

I feel so awful for forgetting this. Shitty Bears football makes us forget to appreciate a person who actually did some good for the franchise. He was before my time, but former general manager of the Bears Jerry Vainisi, who was in charge during one of the few times when the Bears were relevant, passed about ten days ago. Some of the readers that were around that time probably have great things to say about him. Yes, Jim Finks built the team before that. But Vainisi drafted The Fridge, William Perry and it helped the Bears win their only Super Bowl. He also added Wilber Marshall and Kevin Butler. I’d say that’s pretty amazing that he got three great players in one draft unlike some general managers that came after him who couldn’t draft one good player in a given year.

And today, we lost Hall of Fame pitcher Bruce Sutter. Again, before my time. But growing up, I heard nothing but great things about him as a pitcher. He played with the Cubs in the 70’s and early 80’s before going to the hated Cardinals. He was the pitcher who gave up the homeruns to Sandberg in ’84. Even though baseball sucks now, I definitely have an appreciation not only for how the game was when I was growing up, but how it was before that. It was surely a golden era of the sport when he was playing.

This Will Be Quick | Football Team 12 Losers 7

October 13, 2022

1st and goal in the first quarter. Can you run the ball? No. We’ll pass and have the ball intercepted.

4th and goal in the second quarter at the goal line. Can you do a quarterback sneak? No. We’ll try to have a back lined up five yards back.

1st and goal at the 5 with 45 seconds or so left. Can you run the ball? No.

Velus Jones fucked up on a punt return two games ago. Can you stop letting take punts back? No. We’ll let him keep going out there and fumble it again.

Can Luke Getsy go fuck himself? No. He’s going to get a contract extension after this latest abysmal failure.

I fucking hate this franchise. Everyone working at 1920 Football Drive in Lake Forest can go fuck themselves.

Open thread | Bears vs. Football Team

October 12, 2022

There is zero reason for us to be optimistic. Five games in, the Bears are all but eliminated from playoff contention. The NFC East is stacked with the Eagles being undefeated along with both the Cowboys and Giants at 4-1. You would have to think that at least two of the Wild Card spots are filled there. The last spot is either the Packers or 49ers.

The Bears would need to go 9-3/8-4 to get into the playoffs. The other teams in the NFC have already determined that is what is necessary. Therefore, the chances of the Bears doing that are less than me going on a date with Cheryl Scott. Not realistic.

Tomorrow night, they could be three losses out of the last spot after six games. The odds were not in their favor to begin with and it just gets worse from here on out.

Oh, and Ihmir Smith-Marsette is still on the team. So you can tell this dis-organization has no idea how to evaluate talent.

Your thoughts in the thread.

It’s Monday at 12:03 p.m. and this fuckwad is still on the Bears.

October 10, 2022

Hey Poles, you’re forgetting to do something today (other than resign as general manager).