Archive for July, 2021

The irony of this trash can

July 18, 2021

Two years ago, I rescued a pitbull/rottweiler and named him Slash. He’s a good boy. He does the right thing by taking a shit in the neighbor’s yard. He knows all the commands and is the most loyal dog anyone could ask for.

When I pick up his shit, I put a plastic bag in this Chicago Bears’ trash can and get to work. Until recently, I was blinded by the irony of putting dog shit in a trash can with the Bears’ logo on it. I actually feel it’s an insult to dog shit to call the Bears “dog shit.”

With training camp arriving by the end of the month, we’re all just on standby waiting for another lost season. And again, I’ll re-iterate that Roger Goodell and the owners are pieces of shit by having 17 games in a season. Scumbags.

But hey, look at this dog. He knows that when he takes a shit, it’s going in the right trash can.

A salute to the greatest: Marv Albert

July 6, 2021

It’s almost 2:00 A.M. and I am finally getting around to this. I’ll try to keep it short.

This past Saturday, the greatest play-by-play voice in my lifetime, Marv Albert, called it quits. He went all the way to 80 before retiring.

This guy was my childhood. As young as I was, I remember every Bulls championship. I remember going absolutely nuts after every one of them. But Marv was at the center of the first five championships as the voice I heard on TV calling them. Bob Costas called the last one and while he’s definitely up there for the best, he isn’t Marv.

I made sure to watch most of the game Saturday night, especially the last quarter. Seeing his farewell after the game was bittersweet.

But I can’t be upset. I have to be blessed. For the last three decades, I’ve heard him call basketball games. I felt spoiled.

If there was one thing that would piss me off about Marv, it’s that he didn’t pull out all those years ago and thus, created The Kiss of Death to Chicago Sports, Kenny. I know that “curse” was broken last year in the form of two come-from-behind victories by the Bears in the first three weeks. But come on. WHY???

But let’s get back to why I called.

“They don’t make them like they use to.” And certainly, there will not be another Marv Albert. No one will even get that close. These new play-by-play guys are not even close to what would be deemed “great.”

Enjoy retirement, Marv. In fact, “YES!” I know you will.

The Cubs SUCK.

July 5, 2021

That is all.