Archive for November, 2019

Hanging On For Dear Life: Laughingstocks 20 Lions 13

November 10, 2019

If you say you thought the Bears were going to win this game, you’re a liar. None of us here thought they were going to.

But the Bears did everything they could to lose this game and exactly like some of us predicted: Blowing a two-touchdown lead.

It was 3rd and 1 and the idiot himself called a passing play that ended up not being converted for a first down. The next drive for the Lions, they scored a touchdown on just four plays. It was ridiculous.

The drive to finish the game, it appeared that the Lions were going to drive 90 yards for the touchdown (and impending two-point conversion to win). Thankfully, some luck and the time running out saved it all.

A backup quarterback nearly took it to the “vaunted” defense of the Bears. This defense is overrated. Better teams would have put up 30 easily.

And next week, the Bears will play a much better team in the Rams. It’s on Sunday Night Football, so the entire football world will be watching this sad, sorry bunch of clowns get eaten alive by Jared Goff.

It’s now time for everyone’s favorite game show: HOW WILL THE BEARS LOSE THIS SUNDAY?

November 8, 2019

Welcome again. I am your host, Fro Dog. Welcome to a game we play about once a year here at Fire Ryan Pace-Fire Matt Nagy. Welcome to HOW WILL THE BEARS LOSE THIS SUNDAY?

Okay, as well know, Matt Nagy puts his players in positions to fail 99% of the time. Whether it’s making Trubisky throw on first and goal only to have it being intercepted in triple-coverage or not running the ball with plenty of time left to try to get a shorter field goal, it’s all possible! Many possibilities and many possible answers!

Well, folks, it’s time to play. So, contestants, let’s see what our options are!

This Sunday, Bears vs. Lions on the lakefront at noon. How will our Bears lose this game? Here are your options:

  • Matthew Stafford sets up his I-Pass and shreds the Bears defense for a blowout?
  • Trubisky has a terrible game with interceptions, many incompletions and overthrows?
  • Matt Nagy decides to just kneel with plenty of time left instead of trying to get closer into field goal range at the end of the game resulting in a missed kick?
  • The secondary fucks up by allowing a huge play in a close game to lose?
  • Or, a choice many fans have made, the Bears blow another two-touchdown lead?

Many other options are there. Feel free to add your own predictions in the thread. The person making a prediction as close as can be to the outcome wins absolutely no prize other than having their comment featured on this website during the recap! I call that a great deal!

Good luck to all of you! And remember, every new day is one day closer to Matt Nagy finally being fired!

The Whole Nine Yards (In The First Half): Eagles 19 Bears 7 (Third Quarter)

November 3, 2019

Matt Nagy: “I’m not an idiot.”

(Tells Ryan Pace to trade Jordan Howard because he “doesn’t fit his system.”)

(*Watches Jordan Howard run down their throats in the same exact “system.”)

What else did we learn?

This team is undisciplined and commits penalties that cost them games. This team is coached by a bunch of hacks.

If anybody wants to check the archives at this site, feel free. I hate being right. But everything that is happening this season is something I (as well as others) predicted. No logical fan should be surprised by this. Matt Nagy is a fraud and even though it was shown last year, it’s being more exposed now. We can blame Trubisky until we’re blue in the face and rightfully so. But when the fraud puts him in a position to fail, it doesn’t help things.

The Bears aren’t coming back to win this game and they aren’t going to win very many the last half of the season. Seriously. When I am writing recaps before the games even end, you know it’s bad.

So, what is Curious George going to do? Is he going to smarten up and fire both Pace and Nagy? Or is he just going to do nothing until the end of the season when he tells the media that his mom is “pissed” and that they vow to be better next year?

I’m fucking exhausted. This team has made me tired. They are killing my desire to enjoy anything about this game.

One last thing: Fuck Dick Stockton. He’s The Original Kiss of Death To Chicago Sports. It’s only appropriate that he has now called two of the losses this year. Very rarely does he call a game that involves a Chicago team winning.