Fire Ryan Poles | Fire Ben Johnson

I want to wish all of you guys a Happy Thanksgiving. I am sure I would forget some of you, so I just wanted to thank all of you as a whole for coming to this website and contributing. I couldn’t pick a better group of magnificent bastards to talk sports with.

It was there ladies and gentleman. There were the Bears at the two-minute warning, driving with a chance to win the game. Then, Cutler goes Cutler on everyone by throwing an interception. And this was after Robbie Gould missed two extra points for the Giants. It was almost as if he was trying to re-pay the favor for just one game.

This miserable season can’t end soon enough. Six games to go. It’s time for the Bears to start Matt Barkley. Sure, he probably sucks too, but the Bears need to see if they have someone other than Connor Shaw who can be on the roster next year. I don’t hate Cutler, but we all know enough is enough. This has been stale for quite some time.

And if someone can tell me why Ryan Pace hasn’t came out of hiding yet to have some type of press conference to address these issues, feel free to let me know. It’s almost as if he is scared to do this for fear of being criticized (and rightfully so).

Let it be known: Jameis Winston got away with sexually-assaulting a woman when he was at Florida State. This guy should be in prison right now. And no, this really doesn’t have anything to do with what happened in today’s game. I just wanted it to be clear. Fuck this human.

Now, onto the game: Fuck the Bears. I am tired of seeing Jay Cutler. Just enough. When someone throws an interception for a touchdown to Chris fucking Conte, you don’t belong on my favorite football team. This franchise is ran by the worst football people ever. This is truly PATHETIC.

Jordan Howard was the only one worth a damn today and even he fumbled the ball.

The countdown continues to what are praying to be final stand of Ryan Pace and John Fox. I’d throw Ted Phllips in that pile of garbage as well, but we all know he could give everyone chlamydia and still hold his job. Fuck this guy with a rusty fence post.

So, the Cubs actually won the World Series last week. Insane.

Guys,

I am going to forget to put a lot of things in this post. I will probably add more in the comments section as time goes on.

For the last eight years, I did not watch one inning of baseball. I swear, that was the case. Just the thought of baseball angered and annoyed me. In 2008, I told everyone I was done and with good reason. The Cubs had just been swept by the Dodgers. I was with my now ex-girlfriend at the time. We were watching that last game in my apartment. Days before, I had told her I was going to be done watching after that Saturday. I honestly did not believe I would ever see this day.

I called Genrebuster after the final out and we chatted for a few minutes. It was pretty emotional and while we didn’t get through everything we wanted to talk about, we will in the coming days/weeks.

Before I get to anything else, I want to say that I never forgot why this website existed in the first place. I never forgot how we all came together as a group. It was all of us being pissed off.

It wasn’t just the losing that pissed me off and forced me to stop watching. It was the shit head fans (douchebags in Wrigleyville), the stench of Wrigley (the smell of piss just frustrated me) and many other things.

Throughout the last month, I’ve had person after person at my job, in my personal life and online, try to talk to me about baseball. I told my customers that I don’t watch baseball anymore. They will never win. I told my friends in real life that they are never going to win and there is no reason to go back.

All through this year, I didn’t watch. I simply just heard what was going on through the news and online. I refused to let my heart break again. I heard about the comeback in San Francisco. Then, I saw they were facing the Dodgers. That was the same team that ended my fandom and desire for the sport of baseball in 2008. Somehow, someway, they won that series. I don’t know all that happened other than they came back down 2-1 in the series.

Two Saturdays ago, I was driving in the suburbs to go visit a friend. I was listening to the Blackhawks’ post game on the radio. Judd Sirott said they were going to the newsdesk. I forgot the guy’s name, but he said something along the lines of: “Well, this is something we thought we would never see in our lifetime: The Cubs have won the pennant.”

That hit me on the inside. But, I didn’t break.

So, the World Series arrives. Once again, still not watching. I am just reading up about it throughout the days they play. I heard about how stressful the games were. Fast forward: Down 3-1.

Then, they win a game. And another. Game 7 is up.

I was checking my phone even more during the night. I was watching the Bulls and eating steak for dinner (steak dinner, boom!). The night before, I didn’t sleep hardly at all. I was thinking about this. None of us ever thought they would even be in this position.

I check my phone, 1-0. Then again, 5-1. Then, 6-3. I was getting even more nervous.

15 minutes after that 6-3 score, I checked it again to see it was 6-6. I couldn’t believe it. I thought to myself: “Well, I am glad I didn’t come back.” It was almost like, this is what the Cubs do. They do this. This is what they are supposed to do: Fuck you over. I almost thought God was doing the ultimate “fuck you” to all of us.

I read about 15 minutes later there was a rain delay. I was watching an NBA game on ESPN. On the ticker, it said that the game would resume at 11:15. I decided that I was finally going to turn the channel to the game. For the first time in eight years, I am going to watch baseball. I am a very superstitious person, but I felt that I couldn’t keep checking the scores. It was time to come back for this night.

I tuned in and a runner is on first with Bryant up. And let me say this: I have little or no idea who any of these guys are. I just have heard about some of them through the news. But, the Cubs score twice (they should have scored more, but who the fuck cares?!). Onto the bottom of the inning.

The first two outs come and I still told myself that they could still fuck this up (as I heard they did earlier in the night). I don’t know who this Carl Edwards Jr. guy is, but he sounds like a NASCAR driver. Fuck. He gives up a walk and a run. In comes this Montgomery dude. Two pitches later, a ground ball goes to Bryant and during that, I am thinking they will fuck this up, too. I couldn’t be any happier to be wrong.

I cannot believe the Cubs have just won the World Series. I was jumping up and down screaming “oh my God” countless times. It was insane. Eight years ago, I was telling all of you that there is no God because of what we have endured. Tonight, I was reassured of that there is one.

There is so much more on my mind, but I cannot end this without mentioning how happy I am right now. I am not going to sit here and say “I’m back to watch baseball like I use to”, but I suffered for the first 22 years of my existence. I am 30 now. I qualify as a real fan.

I love all of you guys. I really do. All of you guys are the best. We all came to the original Fire Dusty Baker site over a decade ago. A bunch went away, but a lot of you stuck around. We all grew up on baseball. We all grew up loving the Cubs. It just sucks that the one of the reasons I grew up a Cubs’ fan, Ron Santo, wasn’t on Earth to see this. Likewise for Ernie Banks for you older folks you grew up watching him. But, I know those two guys are up with God right now celebrating. It makes me very emotional thinking about it. Listening to Santo on the radio growing up made me love baseball more than any other sport. Ron and Ernie watched this game together up in the sky.

Maybe later, I’ll chime in with more. This post wasn’t to get attention or whatever else others on the outside may think. This is just me letting everyone know (especially you, Dave), that I saw what was said in the last month. I was just keeping my distance until now. I was thinking about writing this the other day, but being the superstitious guy I am, I tried to not think about this too much.

Regardless of what happens for the rest of our lives, God-willing we live forever, but if we are to leave this world, we can leave the happiest motherfuckers in the world. We finally saw this.

Tick-tock. Tick-tock.

Instead of staying up late or doing this in the morning, I decided to type out a recap of the game before it. Two years ago, when the Bears went to New England and were spanked, I did something very similar. Sure, someone who may never watch football could have predicted that game, but I wanted to do it again.

Before that, rumors have been all over the place that John Fox will be canned eventually. The more they lose, the sooner it will be, I suppose. Hey McCaskey’s, if you are going to fire Fox, send Ryan Pace and Teddy Bear Phillips with him. It’s a collective effort, after all.

Now, on to this recap:

Jay Cutler: He’s back. It looked good early on (as it usually does). Then, Cutler and the whole “holding onto the ball for a long period of time” happened again. If only this offensive line can protect the quarterback for ten seconds. I don’t hate Cutler. I really don’t. I just think it’s time for him to go as well. It’s not working and hasn’t worked. Enough is enough.

Jordan Howard: He’s one of the few bright spots this season so far. But he doesn’t make up for the rest of the picks by Pace who are busts. Keep giving the ball to Howard.

I-Pass Defense: Well, the no-named, no face defense showed up again. I swear, if I saw these guys on the street, I wouldn’t know who they were. The Bears drafted quite a few guys on defense these last two years and not one of them is helping. At least two pass interference calls were made because the no-named, no faced defensive backs didn’t turn around when the ball was thrown. HOW FUCKING HARD IS IT TO TURN THE FUCK AROUND SO YOUR BACK ISN’T FACING THE QUARTERBACK? FUCK. That’s how bad and PATHETIC this defense is. Vic Fangio, Mr. Defensive Genius himself, is a phony. This whole fixing up the defense thing will take years. Fuck.

Alright, the Bears are 1-7. Can Teddy, Pace and Fox all be fired now?

For a moment there, I actually thought the Bears had a chance to pull one out of their asses. Every year, there is at least one game where the Bears have no business being in it and somehow, shock everyone (including themselves).

Poor Brian Hoyer. The guy still finds himself in the NFL. He even had a chance to break an NFL record with five straight games of 300 yards or more. Yes, as insane as that sounds, he had a chance to set an NFL record with five straight games of 300 yards or more. It appeared that he had a chance until he threw a pass with his arm going right into Julius Peppers’ helmet. He either broke it on the follow-through or when he was falling on the ground. Enter Matt Barkley. He had a nice pass or two to start. But after? Not so much. No need to get angry at this guy for sucking in this game.

Rodgers gets hit and the ball comes out. First-round Leonard Floyd recovers it and it’s a touchdown. Bears up 10-6 in the 3rd. Then, Aaron Rodgers happens. And it happened a lot. Three touchdowns on three straight drives assured the Packers of a victory. The Bears’ defense couldn’t tackle nor stop getting penalties. They also couldn’t cover anybody either. Tracy Porter was shown throwing his helmet on the sidelines.

With the Bears now at 1-6 (far off from the 19-0 I had with them in Madden), they can at least do the right thing by letting Barkley start. Nine games remain and the Bears should see if they some type of backup. I forgot about Connor Shaw and his broken leg in the preseason. The Bears should should bring him back next year just to see what happens. It will be for cheap, too. But for now, throw Barkley out there for the rest of the season or if he gets hurt (whichever comes first).

One last thing I want to mention: Kyle Long made a big mistake this season. He’s one of the few players on this team that is worth a damn and while we all appreciate him trying to play, it was stupid. The guy had a torn labrum in training camp and instead of getting the surgery to conserve his body this year, he tried to tough it up. He was injured trying to pull up Hoyer after he was hurt. This shit is so bad, you can’t make it up. The Bears really fucking suck.

Miserable. Just fucking miserable. The Bears were 13-0 and 16-7 in the 4th quarter and should have been up by much more. Instead, the offense just stalls in the red zone and kicks field goals.

This is a game that is grounds for firing John Fox. There is no excuse. Not a single excuse. I know, this helps the Bears get a better draft pick. It’s not in my nature to cheer against the Bears. I just can’t do it. And let’s just say the Bears get a high draft pick. Do you trust that Ryan Pace will pick the right player? I don’t.

Fuck this PATHETIC organization from top to bottom. Fuck these worthless pieces of shit.

I am going to try to make this as short as possible since I am pissed off right now.

Connor Barf: Missed field goal. But wait. A running into the kicker penalty. Another chance to get points. Then, another miss! Oh, man. The Bears really replaced Robbie Gould there. Go eat a bag of dicks, Connor.

Vic Fangio: Hey you, Mr. Defensive Genius. Your defense didn’t look like a defense in the first half. Then, that touchdown drive in the 4th that Luck did with ease. You sir, are an impostor. Oh, your defense did get a lot of sacks today. Too bad the Colts drove down the field with ease to get into field goal range. Go eat a bag of dicks, Vic.

TOO MANY PENALTIES.

Brian Hoyer: Okay, dude. Three straight games with over 300 yards passing. Mr. Hoyer was the second quarterback in franchise history to throw over 300 yards in three straight games. The first one? Josh McCown. Wow. This franchise really fucking sucks. To have a history going back 80-something years and only two quarterbacks to do this is quite PATHETIC. But hey, Hoyer really did everything he could to help the team win today. Likewise with Jordan Howard. At the end, another penalty and bad execution fucked away this chance at the end. Hoyer shall remain the starter.

Cameron Meredith: Nice Touchdown. Then, nice fumble. Go eat a bag of dicks, Cameron.

Oh, and fuck Connor Barth.

Next up, the Bears will continue their quest for a top 5 pick in next year’s draft against the Jaguars. If anybody wants to throw in predictions on how the Bears will somehow, fuck this one up, feel free.

Well, that’s just fucking great. First Kyle Fuller and now, Kevin White is out for the season with a broken leg. Are we keeping track? This is just another name on the long lists of first-round busts that the Bears have had throughout the last two decades.

I get it. It’s a freak injury. White was playing well the last two games. I was excited to see him play. But, this is just enough. Only one player that I can think of that has been an actual success and that’s Kyle Long and he’s going to need surgery soon for his torn labrum.

It’s the new NFL with all of these injuries all over the place. But is this something the Bears do more than other teams by drafting busts nearly every year in the first round? This is getting annoying.

Can the Chicago Bears please, find a front office that can be competent and find players that can contribute for the next decade? Is it that fucking hard? Why do teams draft franchise players after the Bears in various rounds? Why do the Bears continuously pass on guys that are supposed to go before them?

If someone can answer all of this, please let me know.